Why Women Fake Orgasm

A woman does it with the best of intentions, just as everything else in this World happens “with the best of intentions”. And it is certainly not because she has a “dark, deceitful nature”.
She has, as a woman, several reasons for it, which came to light in one of the training laboratories.

Once, in a mixed-gender group at a seminar on the theme “Male and Female Initiations”, this question unexpectedly became the subject of stormy discussion and exploration by the whole group of participants. The male half at first reacted with protest to one participant’s admission, saying that she was in the wrong and was behaving dishonestly towards her man. And then the women began to defend their “sister”, saying that practically all women at least sometimes resort, or have resorted, to this trick, and some even very often. The men were outraged and puzzled by this revelation, and wanted to believe that with each of them, at least, “everything, always” happens for real, and that no woman would fool them, meaning each one in particular, and so there was no point lying about it:
“But why do you do it?” came a man’s question from the circle.
“Well, we’re doing it for you,” the girl answered.

The group was heated by the theme, and so that the discussion would not be empty talk, I suggested, turning to the women, that we first demonstrate the phenomenon, and only then discuss it. Who wants to? Naturally, without a man taking part, and without taking our clothes off (we were talking about faking, after all). An ordinary lab exercise, so that the men would understand what we were actually discussing here. Some of the men were sure that they could certainly tell the genuine from the fake.

Two brave girls – not at once, but they did dare – accomplished this feat for the good of humanity. With the lights dimmed, we saw two vivid performances on the theme. Beautiful, different and vivid. After which, in the silence that hung there, a man’s voice was heard:
“I think I’m beginning to doubt myself as a… man,” one guy said to the man sitting next to him, and they nodded to each other meaningfully. Thereby giving a high mark to the convincing imitation.
Well, good, now it is clear what question we are going to explore. To explore the motives of the phenomenon, not to argue about whether it is possible or not.

“We’re doing it for you” sounded as one of the motives. And if we remember that everything a person does for others, they do for themselves, then behind such an answer we have to look for the next, deeper reason. I will not tell you any more about what went on in that laboratory, which ideas, feelings and tasks cleared up the distortions in the relations between the sexes; for that it is better to take part in future seminars.
But I will gladly share my conclusions on the theme of THE FEMALE REASONS FOR FAKING ORGASM.

I will begin at the end. To draw conclusions about the reason for faking, it is good first to look at the phenomenon of ORGASM itself: where does it come from and what does it give a woman?

A healthy situation.
An opened-up femininity has a great deal of trust in the world around and in herself within. And that means that other people’s opinions do not affect her perception of herself and of the processes around her. The Fear of Being Judged – so typical of girls – has practically no power over a woman; she herself knows who she is and why what is happening is happening. Such a Whole Woman will naturally end up as a couple with an equally Whole Man, and since there are not many such people, they experience each other as the BEST. And what else can inspire such a peak state of pleasure as strongly as the realisation that your partner is the best?

With a genuine awareness of your own worth, there is no situation in which, actively and anxiously, the idea of neurotically “improving” yourself or the impression you make arises. A relaxed giving of the best – of yourselves – to each other.

That is why a woman is natural and relaxed, and without thinking, without looking over her shoulder, ALL OF HER is in her “good”, and moves closer to a greater “good” when ALL OF HER is ready for it, and in no case earlier. She is whole.

When she does not feel good, she withdraws or moves away in space, easily and without effort, without judgement or reproach, which lets the man, and herself too, feel her body more deeply.

It is precisely the language of the body – yes, the body, more rarely talk – that shows her man and helps him to hear her, and to draw out of her the energy of this sweet, inspiring phenomenon, for both of them: female orgasm.

Relying on her inner truth and purity, the whole woman finds herself where she should be and with the one who is her match. That is why, in a certain sense, these Women live in “paradise”. Hence the pleasure is complete, abundant and long. In such Women, during Orgasm, there is not a grimace but a smile on the face. They EXPERIENCE it with their whole body; wherever the epicentre of the phenomenon lies, “the ripples on the water” spread out, reaching the farthest corners of the body. A whole psyche, and an orgasm through the whole body, at full height.

And then there are Women who live at War – these are Women who DO NOT accept. First of all, who do not accept themselves. Who do not experience themselves as perfect enough to rejoice in whatever feelings are born within – freely living them out in the world. Such a Woman – from the idea that she is not yet good enough – takes even good events as undeserved. Lying low, hiding her background anxiety, such a woman is as if “at war”, because the world is hostile to her, and even when something good comes, she accepts it as a temporary, undeserved, almost “stolen” pleasure, remembering that “the enemy never sleeps”. Or they agree to a relationship with a man whom they do not fully accept – just as they do not accept themselves – and this does not let them relax and enjoy each other.

Controlling her non-acceptance, whether of herself or of his actions, a Woman cannot switch off her head, as though she were constantly going through customs and passport control in her head, deciding how to “correctly” let him know what she would like. And also: how to make him like her, so as not to lose him. She is sure that simply to be, natural, herself, will not be enough.

The thought of “not losing” is the main one in this drama, the one that female pleasure stumbles over.

A manipulator does not EXPERIENCE emotions but selects and demonstrates them. The same happens with orgasm in a woman who is not whole: she composes it and demonstrates it. Every woman has the partner she deserves. One who matches her inner honesty and her ecological attitude towards her own processes; if she herself betrays and tramples on her inner world, shutting away her true feelings, then her partner will not hear her needs either.

In such couples, at that moment, faking a female orgasm is the best solution, in which at least one of the two gets pleasure.