Seminar-Mystery “Me and the Shadow” in the Carpathians, 24 February – 4 March

What is the Shadow?

There is an opinion that Light is better than Shadow. That monsters lurk in the Shadow and it is better, they say, not to look in there, not to wake them. Not to provoke. And that, on the whole, is how it is. But precisely on the whole, without details. And in the details lie the essence, the individuality and the uniqueness of the human path.

So if you want to live quietly, calmly and without adventures – stay at home. Any journey is dangerous, because it widens the boundaries, and therefore – destroys what exists. All the more so a journey into the inner world, all the more so into your own SHADOW.

I like to call the mystery “Me and the Shadow” a psychic slalom. When the descent from the mountain of the Ego happens swiftly and the result is reached fast. What result? That depends on who needs which…

It all begins long before the event – with the decision to come. With the fact that some are held by the space of their life with all its might, not letting go. Others – it shoves out, stimulates.

The next important stage is forming a personal request. From a vague: “there’s something wrong with me”, to a quite specific “I lack confidence”, or “I want to get married”.

Personally, I bow before the participants, because there are not so very many who can dare such an adventure.

When the participants meet for the first time, they seem like beads of different sizes, textures and colours. It can be hard to imagine how they will get along in one necklace. And then, when the fabric of the mystery unfolds and gains volume, it is no longer a necklace we are talking about, but an embroidery, say… Or a treasure chest in which lie fabric and beads that cast a SHADOW, a multitude of Shadows, from which you have to choose the one to which you need to turn your attention first.

The first two days of the mystery are a study of the EGO. This is how we are used to being, how we are comfortable, how we show ourselves to society when we want to please and achieve results. The smiles and looks that are habitual (to ourselves), the buttons and the props. And at the same time – a hunt for the parasites of the inner world that manifest in speech. As I speak – so I live.

In more detail, this is important: several groups of words are forbidden.

1. Generalising words. ALL, EVERYTHING, ALWAYS, NEVER, NOBODY, and so on. They are a way of joining the majority and de-individualising. That is – giving up your own SELF, your independence, your responsibility for decisions and opinions. The aim of such a strategy is “I’m like everyone else, so not much is asked of me… I’m only imitating the majority… It’s not my fault!”
2. KIND OF… slipped unnoticed into the fabric of conversation, devalues the processes of life. “I kind of came…” “I kind of want…” So did you come or not? Do you want or not? And what has “kind of” got to do with it?

People often say “I don’t say that word!”… until the leader (and then the group) begins to draw their attention to how often they say it!

In it, in this parasite, there is a message: “I’m little and insignificant, don’t ask much of me…”

3. JUST… “I just decided to do it this way…” So did you decide or not? In “just” there is a reduction of a decision (an event “just happened”), or of a feeling (“I just felt”), to the level of an insignificant trifle, a belittling of your uniqueness: “I am simple, insignificant, like everyone else…” In this there is a betrayal of your divine essence, of the particularity of your path. Simple… nothing…
4. Transferring the meaning… This is when, instead of “I go, I want, I do” and so on, a person says: “YOU go, YOU want, YOU do… (meaning themselves!). This is an attempt to unite with someone else, to take them as allies, and again to shed responsibility for your own life.

   

For each of these slips there is a punishment. It may be jumps, squats, press-ups or any other physical exercises that are good for the body, which on the one hand bring a person back into reality. And on the other, draw their attention to how they speak. Through the body it gets through quickly and well, tried and tested!

It matters that the punishments are decided by the group. It also (not only the leader!) watches for slips and punishments. And even if a participant of the mystery takes away only this (cleans up their speech), they will greatly change their life, tried and tested!

An important part is the format of silence in the mornings, which turns the participants’ attention inward, and gives the chance, from the outer, habitual world of social rituals: (“Good morning!”, “How are you?”, “Did you sleep well?” and other politenesses and courtesies), to turn to yourself and follow WHEN exactly you feel like saying an unsolicited courtesy, or something clever, or asking for support like a child. Or to DETERMINE before whom and why you want so much to look good. For what purpose?

The search for the SHADOW doesn’t come easily to everyone. Especially if the request was not specific, something like “there’s something not right with me”. And what is not right and wrong, and where to look for the resource – the whole group helps with that. After the two previous days a lot is already visible.

The resource is in the SHADOW, in the denied (but existing!) parts of the personality. Forgotten, censured. Suppressed….

– in the brave it is the inner Coward

– in the happy-go-lucky it is the inner Controller

– in the boorish it is the inner Charmer

And so on… the list tends to infinity.

Why are some parts (qualities) suppressed by a person?

The answer is simple: once upon a time they were told “bad”. And what is more, they were told so by important, significant people. Parents, for instance. They condemned a girl’s coquettishness, or a boy’s sensitivity. And since then the girl seems to have been bewitched, her EGO is “dry and strict”, and the boy has been bewitched, his EGO is now “a real lad – tough and strong”. And it would all be fine, but it means – walking all your life on one leg and looking with one eye!

What names can the SHADOW bear? Oh… the variety is impressive! Examples:

– the Attentive Bore (if the ego is a cheerful slacker);

– the Cheerful Parrot (if you yourself are serious and obsessed with creativity);

– the Iron Lady (if the ego is a wet blanket);

– the Beloved Wife (if the request is for marriage):

– the Sunny Bunny ( if the participant resembles a sad hermit);

There are one-word names too:

– the Cheeky One (if the ego is too delicate and has had enough of it);

– the Boss (if the aim is to make a career);

– the Beauty (if a woman doesn’t feel worthy of attention)…

And so on, there are as many variations as there are people, and even many more.

The next stage of working with the Shadow is to invent the life story of the shadow character, in the genre of “once upon a time there lived a girl (a boy) in such-and-such a family… and such events happened to them…” In a word, how did the character the participant is playing “come to such a life”?

The beads are strung in a new order each time, they play with other colours and glints.

A trek into the mountains… a look from the heights into the depths. The depth and the urge to jump into it are a symbol of readiness to dive into your subconscious in order to light up some of its parts. And, standing at the edge of the precipice, to be aware of your feelings about it, immersing yourself in reflections and forebodings.

The blind process goes in two stages. First – the tasting, then – the immersion. For the tasting, an hour in each direction (working in pairs – the blind one and the guide). A wonderful chance to look at your strategies – how I know how to care. To lead, to give freedom, to protect, to teach (in a word, the parental functions) – that is if I am the guide. Or (if I am the blind one, in a blindfold), how I can trust, play, explore, be attentive, obedient or rebellious, brave, frightened, fast… meditative…

Yes, by the way, it would all be primitive and uninteresting if you could talk. As it is – even sign language is unavailable, only claps, slaps, exclamations, hissing and purring.

Each pair behaves differently: someone, being blind, stands and listens to distant rustles, rediscovering the world of sounds, someone runs about the whole glade, someone climbs into the thicket, desperately breaking branches. You can draw parallels and understand about yourself:

– how I behave in new conditions;

– how far I can trust another;

– how I meet the unexpected;

– how much fear there is in me;

– how fast I adapt.

And much else…

The morning meditations take place in silence. These are breathing and movement to music at a rhythm comfortable for the participants – a different one for each. The meditation raises emotional blocks, marks out bodily clamps and allows them to be dissolved or at least discovered.

The evening meditations are holotropic breathwork on the theme of childhood or the family or the material that has come up by then.

A mystery differs from a training in that it has no rigid plan and the leader is very attentive to the requests and moods of the group. Sometimes the sharing (discussion) can last several hours, if it is necessary to dig down to the sources of the problem.

Little sleep, food without salt. This too is part of the process, the body should not feel too comfortable, in order to draw out all the nuances of the Shadow, to remove the rigid frame that keeps the ego in its habitual bounds.

Why are we here? For new selves. And that means that in the old selves there is something that long ago lost its effectiveness, like tools that have broken or gone blunt. It is quite clear that we need to start using new ones… but how hard it is to part with the familiar!

The feelings and emotions that the participants have towards one another (and towards the leader) are also part of the mystery. They are not always blissful, quite the opposite.

A quotation from a typical conversation:

“ – Now I know how not to, and I don’t want to go on like this. But how should I?!

– There will be no answers. You will have to look for them yourself. Otherwise the leader turns into a new mum… what do you need that for?”

Who should not come to the SHADOW?

Those who want to please the leaders and prove to themselves that they are cool. Those who have no inner readiness to throw themselves at the embrasure in the fight with their own fears.

In the Shadow (for everyone!) there is a crisis. This is when resentment at those around (first of all the leaders) whispers: “they hate you, they envy you, they want to destroy you, they are asserting themselves at your expense… and WHAT AM I DOING HERE?!”

By the way, the most important rule in the Shadow is the rule of “STOP!”

If the tension goes off the scale, if you have no strength to bear it, if the EGO resists so much that it cannot integrate the changes, you can say “STOP” and take a time-out from some specific practice, or leave the group altogether.

In the mystery there is no expected result, any result is good by definition. Because in any case your path, your desires and intentions get clarified. And after the Shadow it becomes clearer where to move. And the leaders offer support after the Shadow and help with integration.

What menu do the leaders offer?

A very varied one…

– constellations

– art therapy

– symboldrama

– holotropic breathwork (rebirthing, vivation)

– Osho meditations

– Gestalt

– blind practices

– shamanic practices (the search for visions, a personal object of power, a talisman, an amulet, a staff, a wand…)

– dream yoga

– Tarot cards

– provocative therapy

– initiatory therapy

– other…

It is not certain that there will be everything listed, it depends on the group and on its requests.

In a mystery there are no chance people and no bad groups. Just as in life there are no inappropriate people or events. Whatever is DONE is perfectly done! Guests become participants, even if only for an hour, for 15 minutes! They play their role in the drama, or comedy, as it turns out. The angels who guard the space send the right signs, people, objects or animals to help us find our meanings. The mystery is part of life, and from life you cannot throw out a single nuance, you cannot ignore a single trifle. This is a new approach that trains the participants’ attention. After the Shadow they become bigger, which means they must have more attention too.

In the Shadow you may not use a phone, the internet or other means of communication. You may not watch television or listen to the radio, and it is not recommended to discuss events from the Big World. Why? The world “beyond the fence” enchants and… gets in the way. Those close to us (loved ones, children, partners) are used to using a person for their own pleasure and for THEIR benefit, whether he likes it or not. And they use the usual, tried and tested levers: “you are needed… you must… I can’t do without you… I’m going through a hard time now, I can’t cope without you… you promised…” and so on. And if you keep in touch with them during this period, the transformation won’t happen.

Tarot cards accompany the participants, prompting and guiding. Accustoming them to the fact that you have to rely on Your own intuition, your own ability to read signs. However, “asking the audience” and the leader can also be done, if you really want to. This is not about fortune-telling with cards at all, it is rather a request for guidance from your own Spirit.

And how about this practice in pairs: “Nobody knows about me that…” There is a version that if a person opens up to even one other person, they open up to the whole World and therefore become BIGGER. The more openness, the more POWER.

The beads in the necklace acquire new qualities – they are no longer beads, but planets that are looking for their new system. What do I want to revolve around? My husband (wife), a child? Parents? Money? My goal? Work? My soul?

A special theme is the exit from the Shadow. Returning to the Big World, you try on your old clothes and understand that they are no good any more…. too small, too big, don’t suit you… They don’t fit, in a word! The old roles pinch, the old smiles slip off, and in their place something bright is flashing, but not yet quite understood…

Where now, new being? Do you already know, or are you still thinking? Or, frozen still, do you try to catch the feeling? Maybe you will draw a card? Or read the flight of a bird? Or the pattern of the clouds? In any case you will turn to yourself, and not to the authorities who governed you yesterday.

Wow, what a life!

Wow, what a me!

I didn’t expect it of myself…

“With all my ruthlessness” – this is how the leader signs off. To be ruthless is to respect your students, to see strength and potential in them!

Registration: Booking only after a preliminary interview.
+38 (095) 209 76 92 Yulia
+38 (096) 337 71 99 Natalia
skype: natavalitskaya

The cost of the event – 10,000 UAH now (after 2 February – 11,500 UAH)
Questions and booking: liogrita@gmail.com / ntktajys dsit/In addition to the programme of the seminar “Me and the SHADOW”, the price includes:
– the journey from Lviv to the place where the seminar is held
– accommodation in a cosy house in the middle of the Carpathian mountains
– meals
– treks into the mountains
– a banyaNot included:
– the journey to Lviv (arrival at the railway station early in the morning of 12 November)
– personal equipment for treks in the CarpathiansThe cost of the event – $400 now (after 30 Oct. – $450)

Payment: Privatbank – •••• •••• •••• ••••

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Sketches from the “Me and the Shadow” seminar in 2015: A participant’s diary (a view from the inside) – http://lifeproblems.ru/iz-sveta-v-ten-i-obratno.html